Temples, more temples...

I have had three days of temple exploring-really awsome. Can't wait to upload my 500 pictures! It has been wonderful to immerse myself in this 9th-12th century ancient empire and all its glories. It does cause one to ponder empires and their eventual fall from glory. Cambodia is a struggling country and quite poor, but people are very kind and friendly even with a continuing resentment about US bombs and unexploded mines harming people to this day. What a weight our government has left on the world.The only harsh words I heard were about my lack of care for my three day temple pass. I managed to tear a corner of it,and that was frowned on by several gatekeepers. There is quite a bit of respect for protocol here.And still alot of traditional religous practices-mixes of Buddhasim and left over Hindu. I've been praying to false (who knows?) idols quite a bit, just to see the drill. For Vishnu worship, we brought fruit & money, all the Buddhas get lotus flowers, insence sticks and money. It reminds me of Catholic rituals. bowing & prayers. Much more drumming around the bigger pagodas. I think I've earned some merit...reminds me of chants for souls in purgatory. Whatever happened to purgatory anyway?

Being templed-out I spent the day with some market shopping and then respite from the heat, sipping lemon drink in a "butterfly" tea cafe which had netting over the garden to keep butterflies in. I went to the local bookstore and traded a book for postcards, had coffee with some Australian folks I met and generally hung out. I am in the last leg of journey now, headed for Hanoi tomorrw. It's been tough to have ten days alone, but I've chatted up strangers and watched weird TV at night.It's a very different experience from my time in Vietnam. Being a tourist is really an experience in privilege and difference. I feel even more grateful for my time in Tinh Khe, connected and part of a community, however briefly.

"Madame, You have many dollars"

Well, my 3rd day here and I am weary of the considerable poverty, endless begging, entries...I've talked to a few other travelers and we all agreed that we are actually spending more than we ever planned to because of guilt and sorrow. It does seem tough to haggle over a dollar, so in the tourist areas, one collapses and just gives it away. It is possible to be a backpacker tourist on very little money, but you have to harden yourself and stay out of the nicer tour areas.There are signs telling you to NOT give to child beggars since it encourages adults to use children that way. And huge government billboards try and scare the touring pedophiles with pictures of handcuffs and other dire consequences.Still, every public area and all temples are surrounded by pretty pitiful looking beggars.An army of monks prowls the streets begging during the day,and bigger armies of prostitutes at night.I am starting to remember fondly all the pesky,hard working and entrepreneurial street vendors in Hanoi trying to sell stuff.I imagine if you stick around Cambodia you figure out ways of balancing your needs with the ocean of poverty. I've met and seen a lot of wonderful young American and European people and orgs. working to keep kids out of the sex trade, and teach them job skills. And there are big parts of the city, relatively prosperous where NGO staff and other professionals live.But you can still go on a tour of huge garbage dumps where kids live and collect or go off to visit the huge orphanages, probably a better deal for many kids. Early this morning I went to the big square outside the palace where more well off parents and grandparents bring toddlers to buy corn and chase pigeons. Adorable,well dressed 2 & 3yr olds tear around and send clouds of pigeons flying.It's a treat to see.And I love seeing the scrubbed school children off to morning classes. I have no idea of percentages but I know many families who can afford it, give their government grant for schooling to families who need it. Not being mother Teresa, I confess I went to the Foreign Correspondent Club (FCC) for good coffee, fruit and banana bread this morning. Walking along the riverfront, I gave small change to a beggar with an artificial leg, watched people buy lotus flowers for the temples, watched a spirited game of soccer, saw fishermen throw nets on the river and tried to just be present in this surprising city. I am frequently amazed to remember that Pol Pot totally emptied the city, forcing everyone to go to the country or, if you were educated, to torture centers and executed. From such a ghost city, this new and ancient one has sprung up and lives.

Landed at the Fancy Guest House

Well here I am in Cambodia lodging at the Fancy Guest House, around the corner from the Palace and the National Museum. This morning I got up very early and walked along the river and watched Phonm Penh wake up and go to work. This included the last elephant in the city, being walked down the main road. Others in the palace grounds died during the Pol Pot wars, and this animal is saved for tourists. The city is a huge mix of beautiful and ancient buildings, old French Colonial buildings and then some terrible poverty all over the streets. It is lots poorer than Hanoi. Many people and children live on the street, many beggars and sick people. It's less hectic than Hanoi because fewer bikes and cars and easier for western tourists because all the ex-pats, ngos staff and tourists have created lots of market for services. You have to specify that you don't want marijuana on yr. pizza! After touring at the Palace today, I had lunch at a restaurant,Friends, a training restaurant for street kids who clean, cook and serve there. It's a little weird to be just a tourist again, but I am enjoying the respite and managing to stumble around by myself with occasional retreats to the tiny balcony of my room. Hope to figure out photos later. I planned to NOT go to the Killing Fields with its towers of skulls, but a Cambodian man suggested I should go to show respect.Not sure...

Perfect Goodby

Marge took me to lunch the day she left. We went to the second floor of Dinh Lang,the traditional restaurant that overlooks Hoan Kiem Lake. She ordered delicate and delicious dishes from Hue region and we were treated to live traditional Vietnamese music because a large party of officials was holding a banquet in the other room. What a treat. Sweetly, the Paul Simon song, "Are you going to Scarsdale Fair?" was on the set list along with very traditional and ancient tunes. Our window side table looked out over the beautiful lake and a small Heron flew across the view. It felt like a Vietnamese poem-also a poem for Marge who loves the myth of the turtle coming from the bottom of the lake and taking back the sword from the King and demanding peace. We were both weary from the time in Tinh Khe which was emotional towards the end, but appreciated each other's gifts and very glad we did the journey. Now we will have to think over our experience there and decide what kind of recommendations we can offer for Madison Quakers. On the way home we met up with a Veterans for Peace fellow and he & Marge went for coffee to mull over other ideas. I went home (hotel) to pack for Cambodia. Cambodia epilogue follows...

Compassion Houses

On Sunday, we went with Mike, Doh and Noel, the Madison Quaker (MQ) gang to do site visits of 6-7 Compassion Houses. Each village seems to have a committe (VAVA)whose job is to identify "worst case" families in desperate need of housing and other support with a priority on those impacted by Agent Orange, a very toxic defolient used during the war. MQ has commmitted to 15 or so houses in the Quang Ngai province where the chemical was used heavily. I thought we had already seen some pretty poor folks and houses in the countryside, but these were surely worst cases for the most part. We went far down rural roads and saw many under-nourished children and poor wooden shacks.The VAVA village or district committee selects the recipients... A very ill woman and her only daughter, taken from school to care for her, an ill man who looked as if he might have AIDs, whose wife abandoned him, a woman who may have polio and had to put her childrten in an orphange, a family with a severly retarded child who seemed to be locked in a dirty closet much of the day because of her violent behavior... It seems like every disease and genetic disorder is attributed to A.Orange and probably much of it is.The simple houses cost about $1,500 each and they are a huge step up for these families with toliets, wells and tiny gardens. We were required to take photos of us with poor folks for future fund raising materials. We did give them gifts of canned milk and some small money. It was emotional day for all of us to look such brutual poverty in the face and to be the weird, wealthy "observors." With the VAVA committe rep., a journalist and and MQ, we (8-9 of us)had to peek into barebones kitchens and bedrooms to "check" progress, I guess, while the new owners looked on anxiously. Of course, it is necessary to make sure the construction that was paid for it actaully completed, and useful for funders to see the results. The MQ have insisted that the houses they fund do not have the usual governemnt plaques, hoping to spare people some of the embaressment of being a major charity case. I thought of many people I've seen in Africa and even Appalachia who still who live in houses that seem not livable. Something so wrong in our world.

Our Five minutes of Fame!

On Monday evening we ended up on national VN TV! The station always does some story from the Tinh Khe region of My Lei on the anniversary. They dedided to highlight our little project with school children (and the major investment of Madison Quakers in the school buildings) as a sign of hope. Marge was doing a puppet show with a sea turle and I was teaching "row row your boat." To those who know my singing ...this should not be broadcast on TV, but they cut the sound anyway.The segment showed little girls crying about our departure and both Mike, in English, and Marge, in Vietnamese talking about the importance of the young people for the future.The little boys, who did not cry, said the girls were like "watery breadfruit." Great expression. When we got back to Hanoi we found ourselves briefly famous for being on TV! All of this was the result of the good work of Doh who works tirelessly for MQ, getting out positive messages, and persauding various officials that we mean well.

We also had a good article in a national newspaper.It turned out OK, but the reporter was determined to make us say that we thought the US government should compensate Agent Orange victims. We tried to talk about the "Compassion Houses" that MQ is buidling for victimes (more on this is in another post). Yes, probably the govt. should compensate victims, including our soldiers, but it is very unclear what the actual effects really are and we have been dragging our feet about our own US soldiers who have been affected by it. I doubt the govt. will ever do this. It is still a pretty touchy subject here.

41st Anniversary

This morning was the annual anniversary commeration (March 16) at My Lai,(Son My). Since this was not a big year (41 yrs), the event was kind of low key with school children and a few vets in the audience. Party officials spoke and then different groups including us (Madison Quakers Inc) went forward to the large memorial, lit incense, bowed three times and placed incense sticks in an urn.One of the other groups who performed the ritual were the 4-5 survivors, survivors of the over 500 total killed at My Lai. Mike Boehm, head of Madison Quakers has established a tradition of playing the violin at the memorial. he dresses in a traditional (and hot) Vietnamese male dress and plays a haunting tune called the Farwell Waltz.So the event was short and very sweet and I was relieved that we did not have to listen to tons of speeches in Vietnamese. I was also grateful that Marge and Tinh and I had spent time at the museum and memorial last week when there were few people around and we could really meditate on the tragedy and loss.

From there we went over to the Tinh Khe school for another ceremony where Madison Quakers Inc handed over the funding for the building that was recently completed.The work feels important since Quang Ngai was one of the areas so devastated during the war.Marge said that the AFSC clinic has estimated one of every approximately 250 people had lost a limb.And most hamlets were burned or damaged. It seems like where ever we go, for whatever reason, we end up with some reminder of the war. I feel very aware that Americans are still so removed from the horror and damage of war that we experience it as abstract and theoretical. That keeps us from really confronting what we do to other people.

A busy time

As we get close to leaving, activity is picking up. Yesterday we held a formal meeting with education officials for the district and exchanged evaluations, gifts and words of mutual praise. Any negative information is saved for long after meetings.One delightful idiom is that people say, "We wish this meeting could go on forever...but.." One specific outcome was that the district people have resolved their misgivings and now want all schools in the district to have teacher aides! A big shift since we only got our approval letter the day we arrived.The headmaster mentioned that this is one of the most sensitive regions (Quang Ngai) because of heavy war activity (and My Lei)and our visit was a small step toward our shared peace. That felt good. Then we all went out for lunch with multiple toasts to shared success.

After that meeting, Our friends from Madison Quakers, Doh, Mike B. and Noel and a young education journalist from the city -proposed going out to the area where first the French, and then the Americans had quarters overlooking the sea.First we stopped at a remote memorial to nurses and doctors who were working in an underground hospital for the wounded VC. The clinic was discovered and then blown up by Americans, killing patients and nurses. Some of the tunnel to the hospital is still intact and we made a solomn and claustrophobic decent down the ladder.A memorial stands in front of 60 graves with no names. We burned incense and placed some on each grave, and prayed together.

Then we drove on to the cliffs overlooking the sea. Marge stayed on top to write while we clmbed down to hang-out at a beautiful bay.

Today we met Luu, our teacher friend for breakfast and then went to visit her family which includes her husband's grandfather of 99! When we took his picture he insisted on putting on his "dress" glasses. He has so many stories since he fought against the French and then the Americans.It is hard on this area to talk with anyone over 50 without a war story.A lot of sad stories,but also pride that Vietnam won and kept its Independance. Now they worry about the Chinese who already are making territorial claims on a few islands. Tomorrow we go tovisit compassion houses.

Life in the Village

A strong spirit of entrepreneurship prevails.Every household seems to sell something.Some along the road have full blown shops of course-bridal shops, gas stations, rice mills....Very hard working people.

The My Lai museum is one of the toughest places to visit as an American, but it is laid out as a sad, but peaceful place. The site is the actual village of My Lai, once a peaceful hamlet of the village of Son My, and Anthropogists have laid out a few foundations of houses, and bomb shelters, and one reconstructed peasant house. The foundations are designed to look like burnt huts,with statues of dead animals lying around it. Walkways between gardens are laid in cement with many footprints imprinted-small and large barefoot prints like a busy path in a village, and then, horribly, the large bootprints of American soldiers. The ditch where Lt.Calley and the 11th brigade lined up some 200 civilians and shot them,is filled with water and planted on the slopes. There are many donated trees and plantings from peace groups around the world and several statues of people in grief, and a Guernica like tile mural of the attack.

The small museum building is an emotionally draining place.The first thing you see is a large wall size bronze with the names and ages of the over 500 civilians killed in 2 days at My Lai, many,many children.The next display is a larege photo of the American helicopter pilot,Lt.Hugh Thompson who tried to stop Cally, and another large photo of the young American journalist who told the story and the American army photographer who took and kept the condeming photos. It is quite remarkable and compassionate to have these men honored here-we don't even remember their names in the U.S. Then there are the actual pictures-awful and heartbreaking war pictures of civilians being terroized and killed-corpses everywhere. and pieces of lives lost, a baby's shirt, a boy's torn school book. There is a well known photo of an old woman with a gun to her head, another of a man trying to shield his children. A full size diarama shows three U.S.soldiers with hate filled faces gunning down children and old people. and very very sad to me,there are 4 photos on the wall of young American soldiers who took part in the massacre. I see them as victims too and know they were wounded in their souls.

We went back to the peaceful gardens after the terrible displays and amazingly, we met two old women (80s) who survived the massacre forty years ago. The government has allowed them to grow rice on their old family plots. Marge talked to one and Tinh and I to another who was working her plot with her grand-daughter. She showed us her injuries and told us her story.She was one of the 6-7 people saved by Thompson and he had come back to visit her before he died. She saw her husband and one daughter and many neighbors killed by soldiers.Her entire village destroyed. We ended up giving the women money as they were still very poor.One woman told Marge, "If I take the money what will you eat?"I thought a moment about it being a "tourist trap,"but decided that no amount of money could make up for carrying those memories. And they were still growing their food,so not getting rich. She hugged me tightly and I felt so much loss for all of us. The place is quite remote and has few visitors except on anniversary days (March 16),but many veterans make their way there.That must be so hard for them.

Marge commented that the AFSC group working in Quang Ngai at that time (March 1968) knew about so many massacres in this disputed region that they could notunderstand why people were focused on My Lai. I think that the answer is that this was a story that got told, first of all.Most stories did not.Second, the fact that three young Americans were the ones to tell it mattered to the whole world. And still does. We left the place and went to worship at the Peace Park down the road. The peace Park has been built by Madison Quakers..

More Tinh Khe

Happy Women's Day

Chuc mung Ngay Quoc Te Phu Nu It is women's day here and this has become something like Mother's Day where women are given flowers and taken out to eat. At home they are said to be "Queens." Women also treat each other and Tinh has taken us to breakfast to eat chao suon, a yummy rice soup made with boied pork ribs. Later we will have lunch with the ladies who work at the hotel. They will serve us chao ga, chicken rice soup and veggies.We will give them a small gift of cash.

Yesterday, the children at school held special games-tug of war, sack races etc. My favorite was the slow bike race where the LAST one to cross the finishline wins.Teachers and children were all excited about who was winning.

In Tinh Khe

Finally found an Internet cafe by spotting the many, many bikes outside...boys play war games all day-sigh. For awhile Xmas tunes were playing...but the Internet works. Amazing since it is a storefront on a dusty road in a small village.It's very rural here so a whole new world of adventures, frustrations and fun. Marge, Tinh and I are teaching 3 & 4th grade and having a lot of fun. I can't wait to find a way to post photos of these very cute kids who surround us and practice their English everywhere we go. The English text and curriculum is geared to passing a written test (sound familar?) so we are focusing on spoken English and we have managed to throw in an Old Mac Donald and a few other songs and plays. The school which was built by Madison Quakers is bare bones but a huge improvement from the old school (My Lai Primary) now called Tinh Khe,and so much nicer than what the district could build alone. We've also held our worship on Sunday at the My Lai Peace Park, been swimming in the south China sea and eaten great sea food here. We're very busy and there are many needs, but it feels right to be here and we are warmly welcomes with many small and large gestures of friendship. Yesterday, the Headmaster invited us into his office to drink coconut milk right from the coconut.

Our lodging is a fading resort that looks out on the sea. We've had a lot of funny mishaps. This morning Marge was locked out of her room at 5:00 a.m. They ended up taking off the entire doorknob to get her in. When we complain about anything-like no water-they tells us, "well it's not a three Star hotel you know!" But is is reasonably clean and I did I mention-it overlooks the sea.

My Lai is a shadow here of course and not everyone is happy to see Americans-why would they be? But two old smiling ladies are tolerated and even enjoyed I'd say. Of course everyone is thrilled when Marge rattles in Vietnamese. more, much more about Tinh Khe later.